Marriage. For some that is a heavy word. A word that instantly reminds them of negative events and moments in their life. Some are currently doing everything in their power to run from the institution, neglecting to implement the vital components of a marriage. Others are fighting and trying their best to keep their marriage alive and thriving.
Not many people want to share about their marriage, especially not the loses and weakest points. Ashleigh Slater, author of Team Us: Marriage Together, shares the ups and downs of marriage; the kinks she and her husband Ted had to work through during the first few years of marriage, the financial obstacles and victories, and example after example of how working together as a team instead of against one another is far more beneficial. When you are married, you are instantly on a team–a team that plays, wins and loses, but together. God strategically chose to pair you up, knowing you were fully capable of making big plays together and being victorious.
Author: Ashleigh Slater
What makes this book different than other books I have read on marriage
- As the author shares her experiences she also allows her husband to chime in and share his point of view, helping readers to gain a better understanding of some of the situations Ashleigh and Ted faced.
- Each chapter ends with a small list of topics to discuss with your spouse, encouraging readers to spend time with their spouse having a heart-to-heart.
My husband and I sat down and answered a question from five of the chapters. Here are our answers to some of Ashleigh’s questions (T=Me and J=My Husband):
If you were to compare marriage to any sport, what would it be and why?
T: Volleyball. Everyone’s eye (the couple) is on the ball (love and happiness). The goal is to, as a team, keep the ball in play and get it over the net to score (adding years to the relationship).
J: (Marathon) Running. Running for a long length of time is a test of endurance. Each runner has to individually strive to make it to the finish line. As they run they get help and encouragement along the way (support system of God, friends, other couples).
When you got married, did one or both of your realize marriage would require change? What took you by surprise?
Both: We both knew marriage would require some changes.
T: I do not recall being taken by surprise by anything. I had observed many marriages and sort of knew what to expect going into it.
J: I was taken by surprise when I realized how much easier life seemed to be, having someone to experience life with, having support and someone constantly available to communicate with.
Make a list of your favorite common interest. Plan this week’s date around them.
Both: Sports, church/ministry related events, shopping, eating good food. We plan to purchase tickets for the NCAA basketball tournament that is coming to Columbus next month.
Do you feel comfortable dreaming together?
Both: Absolutely! Our dreams can only manifest if we believe together. Our home can only be blessed if we are in agreement.
Imagine you and your spouse fifty years from now. What do you see?
T: Looking at the success of the family we raised, smiling at our children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
J: Traveling, ministry, and happiness.
- Make your husband a sandwich
- Before nagging and beating him down with criticism, set up your conversation by firstly offering him 1. praise/affirmation, 2. criticism and 3. praise/affirmation.
- Give grace freely in your marriage as Christ does with us as individuals.
Purchase this book and learn more about Ashleigh Slater HERE.
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